As I was set to have my labor induced, they decided to drop in at the hospital. My brother, unknowingly, told one of my uncle's on my dad's side that I was in the hospital about ready to have the baby. They were in the hospital and wanted to see me! They have never been the type to be there for me.
I decided to let them come into my hospital room only to make my father happy. I knew that it was a big day for everyone so to please him...I allowed them in. It was a total of 3 of them. 2 of them had went to my wedding...about 2 years prior to having a kid. From that day of my wedding, I didn't see them again. Before the wedding, I have not seen them for over 15 years...Why Now?!?
The other one did not go to my wedding...in fact her reason was that my dad and her had an issue. I thought it was MY wedding not my Dad's that she was invited to. Anyways, they were there in the room with me. The first words that come out of her mouth was...I was thinking about you all day. You mean to tell me after 15 years I came to your mind?!?! So when I had the time off from work to go and personally hand out invites to my wedding and everyone in my dad's family stood me up...You weren't thinking about me then?!?! You didn't want to see me then...WHY NOW?!?!
Trying to keep a smile...I tried my best to make conversation. At the end they asked me if there was anything that I needed for the baby. I said no, that I had everything. Then they said that if I needed anything to let them know. First of all, I have my husband. We are just fine taking care of our baby. If YOU wanted to buy something for the baby, then just do it. Don't ask if I need anything because I don't want to trouble you for anything. A gift should come from the heart not because I tell you to get it.
Over all, I am closer with my mom's side of the family. My dad's family never came around. It was only during holidays or birthday parties that we would see each other. You can't build a relationship by only seeing someone a couple of times a year. Don't get me wrong, I knew who they were and what relation they were to me. To say that I would spend the night with my cousins or they would come over for dinner would be a lie.
My son is around the age that he is starting to get 'Stranger Anxiety'. He will cry with those he does not know. It doesn't mean that he's only going to cry with 'strangers'. He will cry with anyone he does not know. He even cries with my own brother because he doesn't see him often enough to know who he is. I know that the baby needs to get used to people but when the people are not used to be around him...it makes the anxiety even worse...not just for the baby or for the people but for me...the parent that has to see my child cry because he is unsure who this face is staring back at him. Building a relationship is building trust in someone's life...you can't build it without seeing them first!
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