So have the times changed? Is it now acceptable for a girl to do things that a guy would normally do?
This week, Oscar has been asked to help choose a male engagement ring. She has already picked out a date...and its not Valentines! Oscar is a good sport about it and offered support as much as he could. When he told me about what he was asked to do, I was so excited! Just the thought of another couple wanting to spend the rest of their lives together is just great! Then the questions started....
Would he say yes? Would he feel less of a man? Why hasn't he asked her to marry him yet? Have they even talked about getting married yet?
So off to work I went the next day and of course I have to consult with the chickas at work. I'm the youngest of our group of 4. My neighbor that I sit next to, who is the oldest, said that yeah it was fine if she asked him. The girl that sits next to her, who is 10 years older than me, said that it would be better if he did it. She said she was old fashioned. My other friend is going through her drama, I just didn't want to ask her.
So after hearing all of them...I started to think about it. I have been raised that the man will ask the father first. Get the 'Okay' and then ask the girl. That's exactly what Oscar did. I don't think I would have wanted it any other way. Oscar and I always talked about getting married. It was always 'when we're married' not 'if we get married'. If he already knows that I'm ready and willing to marry him then he shouldn't have a problem asking. So why would this guy have a problem asking? Is he comfortable with the way things are that there is no need to ask?
I know every situation is different and I understand that. If you can't see yourself spending the rest of your life with the person that your with...don't waste their time or yours.
2 comments:
I do agree its sorta odd, I mean now and days women defenitly do things that were once considered only for men, and no one seems to care. I personally would not want to be the one asking, perhaps I am old fashioned, perhaps IA m a hopeless romantic, but there is nothing like your man doing it :)!! Either way I wish her the best and hope it all goes as planned :)
The man should propose. If he hasn't proposed yet, there's probably a reason. Maybe he's not ready to settle down, maybe he hasn't sewn his wild oats, or maybe he does wants to get married, but just not now.
Some guys will think, "We're doing great now. Why rush into marriage?"
If she proposes, he'll say yes only out of pressure. He'll feel trapped and the marriage won't work. He will cheat, I guarantee it.
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